The Pursuit of Happiness

Well I just turned twenty-four recently, I’m close to the quarter century mark, yea laugh it up I’m pretty sure most of you reading this are closer to a half century. Oh yea I said it! Anyways It took me a long time to get here. Lots of changes that I went through to make it here alive, some very good ones, and some not so good ones. However they all got me here, and I wouldn't change any of them for the world. Today I woke up, and I realized something, I am happy. I am really happy, and to be quite honest I can’t remember the last time I felt this way.

I finally see that, and I am accepting that I’m creating my own happiness. I no longer am waiting for something to just happen. I get up every single day with a purpose and that purpose is to just be me. To do what I want with my life and with what I have available to me. Most of my life I tried to be what I thought everyone wanted me to be, and the more that I look back at it now the more that I see everyone really just wanted me to be myself. The people that mattered anyway.

People seem to think that you have to chase happiness, that you have to find it. Much like people seem to think that you have to “find yourself”. You can’t find happiness, happiness finds you. It’s much like anything that you want, the more you seem to want it, and the more you seem to search for it,  the more it just falls away from you.  Then once you stop searching and stop digging for that ultimate “happy high” that’s when you find it, and that’s where it’s waiting for you.

I once told someone I needed to find myself to be happy. Once I find myself and figure out who I am then all my happiness will fall into place. What I didn’t understand is that you DONOT find yourself you CREATE yourself. To find something means that it was once lost. I don’t really believe that we ever “lose” ourselves. Now when I look at it I see that every human being is a blank canvas and every person is their own artist. We have the power to create who we are, to be our own Leonardo, and make our life, our own Mona Lisa Smile. Everything we do, we created, and every choice we make we decided; because at one point everything we did was exactly what we wanted.

I do believe that everything happens for a reason. That our life changes so that we can learn to change, to make that adjustment, or to throw on the paint thinner and start all over. I believe that people change so that we can learn it’s okay to let go. No matter how hard it is, because if they have changed it means you also have changed. Everything in your life has a purpose, and it’s purpose is to help you create your best masterpiece of all. Yourself.